How many times have you re-written Chapter 1?

Guys, I must be a total dweeb.  I think I’ve re-written Chapter 1 of my novel 30 times if I’ve written in once.  As I write this, I’m in the process of re-writing it again!  Why?  Why do I keep fudging with it?

I have to admit this time it is much better and it moves the story forward faster and I can cut a bunch of words, but didn’t I do that the last time?  If I keep doing this, Chapter 1 may be gone and Chapter 3 will take its place.  Then Chapter 3 will dwindle away to make room for Chapter 9 to take over.  Ahhhhh!!!  Before I know it, my book will be about 30 pages long…the shortest fantasy novel in history!!!

Hey!  Wait a minute!  *snaps fingers*.  That’s it!  I’ll make it the shortest fantasy book ever!  I can do that!  But wait…no I can’t.  Writing means editing which means the first 10 words will be replaced by the next 10…page 4 will replace page 1, and so on, and so on until there’s nothing left.  My story will fall into oblivion.

Wait!  *snaps fingers*  Did I just find two more titles for books in that rant?  Who would have thunk?

How many times have you re-written Chapter 1?